I am 35 years old, living with stage IV Endometriosis, possibly adenomyosis and struggled with infertility for almost 4 years. I also struggled with PPD and now struggle with PMDD. I am a mother to a son that was born at 18 weeks and too precious for this earth; and now a mother to a son born in August 2011. By journaling here, I hope to benefit both for myself and for others that are dealing with this disease and fertility struggles. Thanks for visiting!

Sunday, May 31, 2009

New beginnings

Or, at least a new week, right? We went out for sushi and wine on Friday night. I had part of a glass of wine and felt so guilty. I wish my period would just come already and put us out of our misery. Until that happens, I don't really feel any closure, you know? It's so strange...just a very strange and not fun feeling. I've been up and down this weekend. We tried to stay busy, which was good. It was a "relaxing" sort of busy though. Lots of time with friends, the sun and the pool.

Tonight we went to see "Up" with some friends. O-M-G, it was not the most uplifting of tales. The story was amazing, but, just not the happy go lucky type of movie. I cried several times. Even my hubby had a tear or two. Just a warning!!!

So, my incision hates me again. Seriously. It was looking SO good. It's at least closing up some now and not still gaping. But, tonight it was really itchy. I pulled my shirt up to check it out and you can see the bandage lines from MARCH. MARCH! Man, my skin had a ROUGH time. This is only really with one of the incisions now-the upper one that they just used to see if they could cut into my belly button! It's definitely going to take a while for my skin to regain it's integrity. Crazy. Well, now I guess I can go on a steroid to help it out.

Oh, my bottom is so itchy and sore (from the PIO shots). I have the lumpiness I wasn't really expecting but I guess I was warned. And, there is a red knot that itches like fire. I'm such a freak sometimes!! ;)

So, no real point to the post. I just needed to write. Ever since the movie, I've just been a little emotional this evening. I'm glad it's almost time to go to bed!

THANK YOU for all the wonderful and sincere comments!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You guys ROCK!


Kelly said...

Up was sad? Now I am glad that we didn't go see it this weekend! Hang in there things will get better!

Yaya said...

Thinking of you.

I wanna see UP!


Anonymous said...

sucky, i hope af comes soon and your bum feels better.

Kischa said...

You're most definately a trooper! Keep hanging in there - I know things will get better for you.

JellyBelly said...

all the kiddies in my class want to see or have seen "up." as soon mr. jb heard that ed asner did one of the voices he wanted to see it. i guess it'll have to be a post report card treat for the two of us!

i think that you should try a castor oil pack to help your incisions heal. i can send you info or you can google it. i did one for a month after my lap and my incisions are healing really nicely.

sending you big hugs!

Barefoot said...

I'm sorry you had a movie sneak attack -- it sucks when you go for a little levity, and you end up with tears. That was "Marley & Me" for us.

I'm glad you've been keeping busy....I've been thinking of you, and hoping that you're doing OK.