I am 35 years old, living with stage IV Endometriosis, possibly adenomyosis and struggled with infertility for almost 4 years. I also struggled with PPD and now struggle with PMDD. I am a mother to a son that was born at 18 weeks and too precious for this earth; and now a mother to a son born in August 2011. By journaling here, I hope to benefit both for myself and for others that are dealing with this disease and fertility struggles. Thanks for visiting!





Thursday, May 28, 2009

Hope, without getting our hopes up

Thank you everyone for the encouraging words! We will continue to hope that we are part of the 15% of normal pregnancies out there without doubling betas every few days. But, we cannot get our hopes up. It hurts too much.

And, trying to think ahead about what's next; or, what's even going on now. Still the possibility this could be ectopic. I can't jump ahead of things. There is no way they could figure that out right now anyway...I just can't worry. Just be aware.

Friday feels so far away!!!

Thanks again!!!

9 comments:

Yaya said...

Okay, take a deep breath. One minute at a time here. Don't get too overwhelmed with thoughts. You can do this.
(((Hugs)))

Kischa said...

There is Hope here - atleast the beta didn't go down, it went up - even if it was just a little bit.

I know it's easier said than done, but try not to worry about the what-ifs, until they start saying that the beta is dropping - there's hope.

517Butterfly said...

I am keeping all fingers and toes crossed that you are in the slow rising beta group! There is definitely hope! ((hugs))

The Patterson's said...

I'm sorry that I don't have really great words to share. But, I'll be thinking good thoughts about your beta tomorrow morning! Hope it will be more than double.

*ICLW*

allisyn said...

i just feel like this song could brighten your day ...it's called "free" by Hillsong United:

would you believe me if I said....
that we are the ones who can make the change
in the world today....
would you believe me if I said...
that all of the dreams in your heart
can come true....today
would you believe me if I said...
that life could be all that you want it to be...today..

Chorus:
and if I had wings I would fly
'cause all that I need, you are...
and if the world caved in around me...
to you I'd still hold on
'cause You're all that I believe...
and the one that created me...
JESUS...because of you...I'M FREE

Verse2:
would you blieve me if I said...
that God can make miracles happen today....
would you believe me if I said..
that you don't need to wait for the answers before...
you step out in faith...
would you believe me if I said...
that nothing is ever impossible...for God...

Bridge:
just live your life...with God inside..
you won't regret one moment of it...
and give all that you can for God,for God



no matter what happens, although we are all hoping and praying that it is for the better...just remember that God is here for you ...even when it may seem like He has deserted you, He really hasnt...believe me, I've had to learn that myself this year :)

JellyBelly said...

sending you prayers!

A said...

Thinking of you. Try to relax (yeah yeah, i know- easier said than done) and know that so many of us are praying for you!

In Due Time said...

Praying for you. ((Hugs))

What IF? said...

Congratulations on making it to Friday! Despite the odds, I hope today brings good news for you and your Dh.