I am 35 years old, living with stage IV Endometriosis, possibly adenomyosis and struggled with infertility for almost 4 years. I also struggled with PPD and now struggle with PMDD. I am a mother to a son that was born at 18 weeks and too precious for this earth; and now a mother to a son born in August 2011. By journaling here, I hope to benefit both for myself and for others that are dealing with this disease and fertility struggles. Thanks for visiting!

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Say what?

Hello all. Wow. I haven't blogged really in a while. Nor have I been doing well at keeping up with others. Connor turned 7 weeks yesterday. 7 WEEKS. I can hardly believe it. I had my 1 month FU obviously several weeks ago now. Everything was looking good. By now all my stitches should be healed (I had somewhere between 15-20!!!) and I am feeling pretty normal most days. Hormones can still be evil sometimes. Guilt sucks. But, for the most part, my new normal is setting in.

I cannot believe the conversation I had with the OB. On BC. Yes, I typed it. BIRTH CONTROL. Weird. Even weirder to be typing it here on this blog. I stopped BC in 2007. Here we are 4 1/2 years later thinking about going back on. We've been blessed with two sons. One here in our arms, the other in God's. We definitely are not ready for another child right away. Connor is a blessing but I am not sure that I can handle another little one at the moment. Nor all of the emotions that would accompany another pregnancy/child.

But, for now, what? I have a dilemma in the BC arena unfortunately. I only have one option. Mirena. I have a history of migraines with Auras, so, any other kind is really contraindicated. Awesome. I am not too keen on that option-something strange about something being inside me emitting hormones on a constant basis. That just seems so odd to me! So, thinking about NO BC. Condoms aren't my friend...I normally get irritations from them, and, with the healing going on down there I am not down with that. I am pretty sure I can't keep up with chartting at the moment. Life is a bit chaotic. And, then there's my ENDOMETRIOSIS. Ugh. I am so scared about it rearing it's ugly head if I'm not on anything. SO SCARED. And then, on the same lines, maybe we SHOULD just try again since my body is probably in it's best condition ever at the moment? Sleepless nights knock that thought right out of the park most of the time.

What's a girl to do? Anyone have any experience with Mirena (good or bad)? Does it have any benefits with endo? The OB said that there isn't a ton of research, but, what little there has been it has shown a benefit. Any other ideas?!?!?!